Thursday, January 25, 2007

Got to find Garhuckle, Got to find Garhuckle.

Dear friends and others.
I am sorry that I have not posted in a long time, but I have been busy tracking Garhuckle's GPS device due to the fact that he gapped it whislt I was was stuck having kezsoed potion (a love potion that was shoved down my throat by Paula's neighbours who are from a tribe deep in the Amazon jungle. Don't know how the love potion works. They explained it, but they have an acsent that is hard to understand... so I'll just play it by ear).
Anyway, back on target. after the last post I watched as Garhuckle ran inside and Paula attempted to follow, but then went around the back and appeared soon after on the roof and into the chimney. Garhuckle ran out and into a cactus (and from what I lip read from his name is Sanchez). I then caught a glimse of Paula rushing out of the house before Suni and Ranta pulled me away from the window and told me about the potion and to drink it, but as soon as I did I was out like a light and woke up then next week in a fruit basket dressed as Little Red Riding Hood, and Apparently (according to a crack addicted bum) said that a wolf tried to eat me but then got scared from the fact that I had eyes tattooed on my eye lids, Thanks Alyss!. Very strange situation. I then caught Alyss flying over head, we caught up and then talked about the multipull Paula's. She then suddenly flew off as allways.

So now I am flying a jet that I found in a field (it didn't have that many people in it (besides, they need a lift New York) in a Little Red Riding Hood costume (for I don't know where my other clothes are) after finding Garhuckle's GPS location (in the ocean approaching New York city). If all goes well I should reach him and 005p within a couple of hours (hopefully 005p hasn't killed him).

As for Paula, I will hope to find and rescue you soon after finding Garhuckle.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

To The Resuce... Once again

Dear followers.
I had been wondering around the island looking for Paula (After she ran off claiming that her home is near. (apparently she found her GPS on the collar of her cape.)) I had been wandering for nearly a month when I came across Garhucke and Paula in a VERY heated discussion. Garhuckle was bent over backward due to the fact that he has a meter long bread knife pointed directly at his head. I then retreated to the nearest house to write this post in fear that I will not be able to writeanother. If do happen to surive Paula's bread knife, I will post as soon as I have it safely under my control.
With shaking legs,

Thursday, December 28, 2006


Dear loved ones and unloved ones,
Paula and I have spotted land, which is good, because I've had enough of being surrounded by seaweed and Paula is obsessed with sushi and keeps eating the weed, she offered it to me and I replied with "If I want to eat seaweed then I'll just like my legs," She wasn't happy. Never the less I hope that there are some animals on the island that I can eat.
With Hunger,

Friday, December 22, 2006

Getting Worried

Dear Readers
I have been checking Garhuckle's blog every hour for the past 24 hours and he still hasn't posted since the canoe broke us all apart (except for Paula and I which may I add is getting really annoying... so annoying infact that I would rather sleep with lions that twitch violently while they sleep, but that won't happen) I am fearing that Garhuckle has drowned, or that Ouga isn't a part of a secret orgenisation and that he just doesn't want to be with us anymore, hopefully neither of them. But I can only hope for the best.

With Worry,


Thursday, December 14, 2006

Outrigger Canoe

Dear Happy people that are far away from me,
The outrigger Canoe has sunk due to the fact that I saw Garhuckle stabbing holes in itwhist whipering (in phonetics) to himself that Ouga must die because he is a part of and has been in contact with the Greek Inteligence Agency (GIA for short). Shortly afterwards there was a loud crack and the outrigger canoe collaped splitting Ouga, Garhuckle, Paula and I up. Of course Alyss flew off to find land and I think Ouga is floating due west... or is it south? I can never tell. Garhuckle is traveling further and further away from Paula and I (Yes, we are stuck together) as we are approaching land. Hopefully once we get to land I will be able to locate Garhuckle and bring him to safety using the waterproof GPS that I implanted in him the moment he fell asleep (as I did with all of them (along with Alyss heh heh heh!)). But for now, all we can do is wait.

Soaking Regards,


P.S. I had a dream that Paula and Alyss kissed... can dreams become reality? If so, I'm scared!
P.P.S. Everyone thinks that Garhuckle is a bastard, I don't think so.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Alyss Flite/Rescuing Paula and Garhuckle

Dear people, old and young,
I had been carring Ouga around on my back for a while and noticed that he weighs exactly the same as Jethro (My watermelon that was father of Gerald who was father of Gerald the II who was father of Gerald the III who was father of Gerald the IV who was my missing pet watermelon who I had to leave to to the fact that my house exploaded.) I then passed the hospital in which Alyss and Garhuckle was in, soon found that Garhuckle was not there and Alyss was out of her coma... al thought I wasn't in the room due to the fact that the nurses wouldn't let me, they say that Ouga smelt weired... Bitches.

I got my hands on a computer and found that Garhuckle has gotten into trouble. Woke Ouga up to get him to use his ears to find Paula but found that he continued stabbing me. grabbed a watermelon and shoved it on his stick and yelled "THERE, LOOK! BIG HARD THING TO SMASH THINGS WITH!" He then looked at it and swung it around, unforunately the watermelon caught the head on a local to whom was knocked out cold. Ran for it. Ouga eventually found Paula in a internet cafe with a crowd of people swaming around her, told Ouga to hit every one on the head... he enjoyed himself emencely with his new found toy whilst I grabbed Paula and once again, ran for it, grabbing Ouga along the way, who the started to hit me on the head as a source of entertainment, due to the fact that I had taken him away from the original source. Got tired of having my head smashed in so I snatched to stick off him and gave him a good whacking untill he fell unconscious. Ended up carrying him again while Paula carried his stick and watermelon who I called Aguo (Ouga backwards).

Ran back to the hospital, left Paula with Aguo and the still unconscious Ouga outside while I dashed in and grabbed Alyss, who said that she could fly and make sure that Garhuckle was at the Outrigger. After 5 minutes we saw her fly overhead and said that he was there.

So now we are at the Outrigger and all very tired. Garhuckle, Alyss Ouga and I are all awaiting Paula's return from the shops with corned beef with the money that she accumulated from the fans that she had (and maybe some fizzy drinks).

Tired Reguards,

Sunday, November 26, 2006

Great... Just Great.

Dear followers of my grim story,
I am now stuck in Greece with Ouga... He seems to be liking me a lot due to the fact that he likes the Indian folk songs that I play on my fish lute, otherwise he just hits me on the head with his stick. I got sick of that so I took the guava off and ate it, Ouga didn't digest that too well, he has been stabbing me for the past hour, then I played a Indian lullaby, in which he fell asleep. Now I have to piggyback him every where. (Thank god he's light!)

Before that a giant Bird woman fell down in out boat after Ouga hit her on the head. She claims to be named, "Alyss Flite" and wanting pancakes before falling back in to a semi un-concious state. I wanted to do so Indian resuscitational skills on her... But Garhuckle wouldn't allow it, he said that I was out of my mind WELL HELLO! IF YOU HADN'T NOTICED I'M STUCK IN A BOAT WITH INSANE PEOPLE, OF COURSE I'M OUT OF MY MIND! (besides, I miss Ankur, I hope that Ishmal has given him his monthly dose of rose water mixed with a bit of cow poo.).

Shortly after Alyss' arrival, we came across the mysterious land that turned out to be canoe-eating snakes. They won, so then we had to use Alyss' wings as a raft. Ouga kept standing on my head... and then jumping on it, he proberly knocked me out because I woke up once being wetter than I remember.

After a while we difted upon the shores of Greece which is where I stand... with Ouga. Garhuckle went with Alyss to search for a hospital, Paula went to search for a drink and I wanted to explore... Ouga came with me.

With a very sore head,